The musings of a girl who's a bit too eager to talk about anything and everything.

Wednesday, June 24, 2015

Things You Hear When You're Engaged At 19:

4:57 PM Posted by Allie Wood , , No comments
By now, I'm pretty sure you've figured out that Brandon and I got engaged. 
If you didn't, now you do.

See, look at our cute little facebook engagement announcement pictures.


 



I'm also pretty positive most of you know that I'm only nineteen. I mean, I'll be twenty in less than four months, but that's slightly irrelevant right now. Background: I spent my whole life, up until recently, in Utah where it's really not uncommon for a girl to get engaged and married right after high school. It's definitely not a rarity. I was raised in a religion (the main religion that is associated with Utah, which is why I mentioned Utah in the first place) that is very focused on the concept of getting married and starting a family. It tends to translate into a lot of young women choosing to get married young. I'm not saying that's a bad thing, I promise. Most of those marriages work very well. I'm just bringing it up because it's just a well-seen observation of said religion. These girls who get engaged/married at age eighteen and nineteen still get congratulated just like anyone who gets engaged/married should. So, I'm wondering why so many people still say I'm "too young" to make a commitment like this. I don't think I'm too young. I'm a legal adult. Specifically, by that term, I'm at an age where I'm legally allowed to smoke, to vote, get tattoos and piercings without a guardian's approval, or, believe it or not, get married without a special age waiver. But, apparently, I'm still considered "too young." Really, guys?

Whatever.

Yeah, I'm only nineteen. But, I'm a nineteen-year-old that has more than a full-time job. It's a 24/7 commitment. I literally signed my life away if we want to get technical here. I'm a nineteen-year-old that's living over 750 miles from my parents. I'm nineteen-year-old that's currently attempting to make a life for myself here in California, away from everything I ever knew, and I think I'm doing a pretty decent job. But, most of all, I'm a nineteen-year-old that happened to run into the love of my life earlier than even I expected.

In light of that, let's clear up some of the misconceptions of me getting engaged young that I've heard, shall we?

"YOU'RE JUST RUSHING THINGS."

Sure, you can think we're rushing things. We'd only been dating about six months when he proposed. But, let's talk about how we willingly went into an engagement knowing it would be a pretty long engagement because both of us are in the Navy and we know absolutely no future schedules. That means we can't really plan out a wedding date quite yet. Such is the military life. I'd rather not plan on a certain date only to find out one of us is going to be deployed during that time. We're looking at anywhere between a year and a half to three years before we tie the knot. So, sure, we're totally rushing things. Yep. You got us all figured out.


"PEOPLE WHO GET MARRIED YOUNG ARE MORE LIKELY TO DIVORCE."

Okay? Cool, you know how to use google, and I'm glad you've spent some time reading statistics on the internet. The threat of the divorce rate of young couples doesn't mean anything to me because, frankly, I have absolute faith in my relationship.


"ARE YOU JUST DOING THIS FOR ATTENTION?"

Yes, by all means, I totally got engaged just for attention. I forced Brandon to propose to me just so I could show off a ring and say the word 'fiancéin a very dramatic tone and pretend to be better than everyone else. That's absolutely how my logic works. For the person that asked me that, thanks for assuming I'm that I'm that shallow. I really appreciate it.


"YOU'RE STILL FIGURING YOURSELF OUT. YOU'RE TOO YOUNG TO KNOW WHAT YOU WANT."

Yeah, I haven't figured myself out yet, but, really, who has? I know what I want. No one told the younger version of me that I was "too young to know what I wanted" and that I needed to "figure myself out first" when I first said I wanted to join the military. Look where I am now. In the military. Like I wanted. PSA: marriage isn't the only big commitment out there. Now, with that said, show me someone who has themselves 100% figured out. Every person I know figures out new stuff about themselves constantly, regardless of age or marital status. Boom.


"MARRIAGE IS BORING. DON'T DO IT."

Fun fact, I usually hear this from people who haven't even been married. Like, what? What do you even know about marriage if you haven't been married? I'm engaged, which is one step closer to being married, and even I don't claim to know anything about marriage. So, if you're not married and I hear you say that, just know I'm probably laughing at you internally. Oh, also, I believe if a marriage is boring, they didn't marry the right person for them, or they're just not doing marriage correctly.

"YOU'RE GOING TO MISS OUT ON SO MANY OPPORTUNITIES."

Most people mean "other guys" when they say "opportunities." So what? Oh, poor me, I'm not going to spend more time getting my feelings hurt and get my heart broken over and over again by guys that don't really care about me. If missing opportunities means having a man that cares about me, one that's willing to stick by my crazy, difficult side, one that loves me unconditionally, then, by all means, I will miss every single opportunity the world has to offer. I'm going to be having adventures with the man of my dreams instead of not wanting to talk about a cool date or memory because I don't want to think about whatever random guy I was dating at the time. HOW ABSOLUTELY TRAGIC.


SO.

In closing, after this super long rant, I just want to say that I'm grateful to have found that one special person that I love, with whom I'll go through this journey we call life. So what if I'm young? It means I get extra time with him. That makes me happy. Whatever people say may tick me off a little (or a lot, if I'm being honest) but they're not going to change my mind. Ultimately, it's my life, not theirs. They can think whatever they want and be grumpy about it while I'll be over here just enjoying my life.

I love Brandon and I still can't believe that I'm the one who got lucky enough to find him, fall in love with him, and be loved by him in return.


"We're all a little weird. And life is a little weird. And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall into mutually satisfying weirdness- and call it love- true love." ~ Robert Fulghum